Rhino Ramblings

Door hanging Rhino

Perhaps some of you noticed, I have not posted a blog in a few months.  I use the word “posted” very specifically, as I have partly written two blogs.  They are intensely, inexorably and incisively personal, even in light of the very intense, inexorable and incisive personal blogs I have posted to date.  I was unable to psychologically and perhaps even physically finish, much less post for the world to read.  Meanwhile, as I was focused on those intense, inex… (you get the idea) musings along with the actual real life events that were placed in my life’s path over the past few months, a writable and postable topic eluded me.

And then, to correctly quote the Mr. W, Shakespeare: “such stuff as dreams are made on” (The Tempest – see The Meaning and Origins of ‘We Are Such Stuff As Dreams Are Made On’ for an analysis) and the modernized version from The Maltese Falcon  “The stuff that dreams are made of”, dreams became the stuff this blog will be made of – or on. Related to a more recent cultural arena, I experienced an Inception type dream  (A Dream Within A Dream: The Psychology of Inception is a relatable academic posting of the 2010  film, Inception).  There are two type of dreamers– those who remember every detail of every dream, and those like me (based on the paper I reference at the end of this blog, this is one case in which I am the norm and not the outlier) that can only conjure up a few details.  In this inciting dream for this blog, I was driving to my alma mater RIT (Rochester Institute of Technology). With rare exception – one of which I will get to shortly – the people in my dreams are amorphous beings rather than identifiable people, I believe the companion was my dear friend and fellow college alumnus, Mark H.  In any case, I ask if he ever dreams of RIT.  He says no, Then the “inception” moment occurs where I relate several RIT-based dreams I have had.  These are in fact actual dream topics I have had – thus the dream within a dream.  One topic is the college magazine likely because I had my first published writing: an article about the campus security driving across the central lawn space.  Driving to RIT, much as I was doing in this dream within a dream, is another recurring theme and often involves being lost trying to reach the campus, The “getting lost” theme arises in the more recent surroundings of Goddard Space Flight Center, which makes sense as Goddard is itself a campus (although the recent ravagings being set upon it may change that environ)

Another scene within that dream that is unusual in that I do not recall similar scenes in past dreams involved me saying something that deeply upset a group we had stopped to chat with. He moved away from me, but I pursued him and tried to just chit-chat as if nothing wrong had occurred.  He replies that he is “in the program”, will attend a meeting tomorrow morning and my presence was hurting his ability to work that program – ouch, quite a rebuke.

The earliest dream I recall is falling down a flight of stairs at a store in downtown Reading, PA. Reading is where I grew up and to this day is still a common dream setting. Many of those dreams relate to my frequent walks to/from the city.  Of course in the dreams the details are inconsistent with reality but contain some relatable truths.  In a similar way, I often return to my childhood home and the backyard woods and side field that were my playground of sorts growing up.

One of the few times I remember a dream about a specific person (and this is one of my favorite dream-based stories), occurred the night before the opening of a Program conference in New Orleans.  In the dream I was anxious and distressed as I was confused about the conference location (lost again).  When confronted by Cathy S., a friend and colleague in my non-dream life, confronted me, I shoved and yelled at her.  Upon wakening I did find my way to the meeting and in my opening remarks apologized to Cathy for my dream assault.  Fortunately, she accepted my apology and does not seem to have suffered any adverse effects.

Travel is a key returning topic.  Getting to and from airports are never straight-forward events.  Typically, a plane ride involves flying at tree-top heights.  Back on the ground, “lost” rears its ugly head again as I wander around foreign (often these cities are in Europe) cities.  I keep pinging on landmarks to try to orient myself. And when it is time to leave, I have many dreams around being past the hotel check out time and I am unable to gather my massively strewn belongings.

Hotel rooms and offices often have a TARDIS (Dr. Who reference for the non-nerds out there) type setting  – bigger on the inside than the outside.  Elevators contain full rooms.  An office opens up to a large mall.  These often lead to another constant theme – trying to find a usable restroom.  And the restrooms are themselves often multi-roomed with far more intricacy than any real restroom need have.

Speaking of elevators – I have few actual nightmares, but one does stand out (or break out).  I am in an elevator that goes up through the roof of the building (ala Willy Wonka but without the ability to steer or control) and as it reaches the apex of its trajectory, I know I am going to die as it plummets to Earth.  So I make sure to awaken myself before that happens. Still, it leaves me shaken in its intensity.

Let’s finish on a happier theme – my first golden retriever – Midas – was a fluff ball of goldenocity. In my dreams, I conflated that goldenness with a different animal as Midas became a lion cuddling with me.

Dreams are fascinating. We are still very much in a dark, almost dreamlike state of scientific research.  And we are beset with misleading pseduscience (a redundancy) dream interpretations that may be fun but ultimately are without basis.  A scientific paper (i.e. loaded with technical jargon that is best skipped over) in the NLM (National Library of Medicine) website Dreaming and the brain: from phenomenology to neurophysiology is fascinating in detailing what we know, which is still little and under debate, and what we are knowing (i.e. within the current process of gaining scientific insight). 

Dream on!