Rhino Ramblings

Argo, Rhino and Ducks

No this is not a reference to Ghostbusters or a tasteless joke.  In this blog, as the picture above implies, I am writing about the normal Rhino ramblings including a slight diversion into my trans journey; the personal (not originally planned to be part of the shot, but Argo snuck in) and in a rare case, a bit of the professional part of my life.

Let me start with a disclaimer – while this blog’s topic is a direct result of the just released SEWP VI Draft RFP (Request for Proposal – a hefty document used to define the scope and processes of SEWP VI), I will not be discussing specifics about the SEWP contracts past, present or future.  This remains a personal blog and it is that personal aspect of my career that I will focus on.

I am at a confluence of time and events.  Thirty years ago, my boss, Howard, asked me to attend a meeting for him and made it clear I was only going to have to attend this one meeting.  Thirty years later, that is all my meetings have been about (particularly the last 24). Without going into boring details (or at least no more than necessary) here is a brief summary of what that meeting became.  NASA (and in particular the three men, whom I have named the SEWP godfathers) came together and devised a new contract vehicle primarily to assist a scientist obtain his computer systems faster.  They had already named the vehicle SEWP – pronounced soup (Scientific and Engineering Workstation Procurement) when I arrived on the scene.  Around that time, Joe, one of the godfathers, said it will be as easy as duck soup.  From there what is now the infamous duck and soup bowl logo emerged.  What also emerged, with the insistence of the General Services Administration (GSA), was a pilot for an IT Government Wide Acquisition Contract (GWAC).  I was on the first board and all subsequent ones as the co-technical lead. After award in Feb 1993, we had to test out the concept and grew steadily (in the hundreds of millions a year range).  In 1996 Congress made the concept official based on our pilot efforts.  Now if you have read some of my recent blogs you may recognize the mid-90s as kindofan important point in my life as I was making the decision and taking the steps to transition my gender (and do it on the job).  At that time we were working on the second iteration of SEWP (conveniently named SEWP II).  The SEWP Exec Committee (including the 3 godfathers, the tech co-leads and I believe one or two others) were at NASA HQ for a presentation. In a rare moment of memory recall, to this day I can picture us sitting together at lunch prior to the presentation.  I told them my personal transition plans.  Except for possibly NASA legal (a whole other story) this was definitely one of the biggest “outings” I had done to that point.  To a man (yes at the time, all white males) I was given their full support.  I likely would have moved ahead anyway, but I cannot lessen the importance their acceptance and understanding meant to me.

My transition occurred while still just one of the Exec Committee members with a full time job at the NASA Supercomputing Facility.  When I asked the committee in 1999 if I could take the leap and become the first SEWP Program Manager (we had operated to that point without any official organizational standing or Government staff except for one civil servant who served essentially as the day to day lead), I was fully Joanne and my career was heading for a major jump.  Funny that my former boss who once told me that I only had to attend one SEWP meeting (slightly off);  told me that the Program Manger job was a dead end one.   He was a great boss and a friend but boy did he get those wrong.

I learned and grew a lot especially starting in 1999.  I was at the top of my game technically and at the bottom of anyone’s game as a manager.  I was fortunate that I was able to bring in a number of staff within the first year who stuck through my awfulness.  And as the program grew (and in 30 years, we have grown every year), I somehow convinced that core to stay on (many to this day) while adding an amazing group of people.  And, putting modesty aside for a second, I also became a damn good manager.  Perfect – not at all.  In fact what I feel most made me successful was realizing how imperfect I really was so I could grow and learn and utilize the staff and their strengths. 

Chug ahead to today and what prompted this blog.  The program is now used by every Federal Agency; it is the largest Federal IT contract vehicle, we have 35,000 customers and almost 10,000 industry partners and from a few hundred million a year we are predicting this year to be close to if not over $12 Billion. Standing still or resting on the laurels of success is not an option, and so we are embarking on the sixth iteration; as the current contracts end in April 2025. This will be my last transition (just struck me that the word transition is both a part of my gender defined life and my professional one).  I have not been secret of my plan to reach 50 years at NASA and 70 years of age – I just turned 66 and I will reach 46 years at NASA in Dec.  As one would expect, I am faced with many emotions.  I have poured my heart and soul into NASA (the years from 1977 to 1999 were also an amazing and successful and exciting journey).  I have poured sweat, tears and joy into SEWP (FYI – in the early 2000s the acronym was changed to Solution for Enterprise Wide Procurement).  The staff is marvelous; the experience is, dare I say, cosmic.  But I have to recognize several facts: ultimately the success of what I have led since ‘99 will be proven if the people and program I leave behind are successful in their own rights; and I have a possible few decades left to enjoy my life, my children and grandchildren, my friends, my puppy, my golf.  And the next 4 years are going to be super exciting.  This next iteration will be the biggest update to the SEWP concept and I am pushing for more innovation than ever before.  And I am so so fortunate in the staff and their commitment and dedication and professional and personal support.  I consider the release of the draft to signal a full charge ahead into a fascinating, and last stage of my professional career. 

I decided to end with a quote about ducks in a row, and Google did not let me down:

‘Those who coast through life like ducks in a row, following one after the other, and those who ride the waves.’” Tears spilled down my cheeks, and my voice cracked. “‘Ride the waves, baby, and live. Live.”

— Gena Showalter

Thank you to all who supported and support me and others.  Thank you to all who have read my blog and given me such affirmative feedback. And – please – I encourage and want your feedback – questions, comments, what have you wondered about either myself or the type of journey I and others travel in life.  I, obviously, have many topics to continue writing on – but I would enjoy and utilize knowing what you all think and wonder about.  All of me is out and open.  Let’s have some fun and interesting discussions moving forward.  Lots of ways to provide feedback – many of them below.   Also, just adding yourself as a subscriber is meaningful to me as there is a form of affirmation.  When someone subscribes, I take to heart. And please feel free to let everyone and anyone know about this blog.